I still dream of those days in which I feel like I belong to somewhere or feel like I'm a part of something. Melbourne seems so foreign and unfamiliar. I get the idea that I'm constantly having strange thoughts and worrying because I am out of my own comfort zone (The once so perfectly fitted world that I had).

I'm also frustrated by the fact that I am constantly caught in situations where I unintentionally hurt people from not knowing how to have my own stand and just blindly agreeing, doing and following what people says. It gets annoying because I get so busy with doing what people wants me to do that i might have unintentionally neglect some. This stupid habit of mine should have been changed ages ago. I'm such a coward because I don't like hurting people and I care far too much for their feelings. Because of my wishy washy behaviour, I screw up all the time.

It's so easy to say "no" here but it's difficult to put it in actions.

I'm tired of looking for excuses and not being completely honest when I should be just to protect their feelings. I should stop.